The Awkward Family Fight

Last night I had the “pleasure” of waiting on a table of 8: granddad, grandma, aunts, husband, wife, all relatives. The husband & wife brought in their two screaming children ages 2-5. So they’re loud, their kids are loud, they are rude from the start, and they ignore me whenever I ask basic questions. Annnnnnnd they were encouraging them to yell and letting them run around through the galley where hot plates of food are sent out.

Beyond letting their spawn run wild, they fail to answer me or acknowledge me, or even look at me when I retrieve many of the items they asked for. I bring over some items to keep the kids satisfied, and the wife asks to have her kid’s food comped because she doesn’t like it. All some of my biggest pet peeves as a waitress, but I try to not let it get to me.

Fast forward 30 minutes, The wife bursts into tears and one of the aunts starts yelling across the table “I can’t believe you! You’re OUTTA LINE!” Frozen holding a food tray, I wonder if I should continue serving pasta while the yelling happens. The grandma tugs on my arm and assures me it’s not me, and not to worry about it. It continues.. “FINE, whatever, Susan. You are RIDICULOUS!” “Yeah? Am I? AM I?”

Every other table in the room is starting to fall silent. Next thing I know, a full on Talladega Nights-style family fight with tears and name calling has begun; the wife runs out of the restaurant in tears and the ancient grandpa looks like he is praying for death after his relatives’ lack of manners. “I’m so sorry about my horrible sister in law,” one of them says. “Uhh. It’s okay.” I say, not really sure what is going on anymore. The wife has fled outside crying to the place where we take our smoke breaks, and our other employees are starting to get confused.

But they don’t leave. They stay, for quite awhile, and continue to argue. I wait til they finally flag me down and I go to hand them their check – and yes, they are still arguing. “I already added the gratuity!” I remind them, as I hand the slip to the aunt. “Yeah, okay” they say as they sort of blow me off again.But the story has a happy ending. Hundred dollar check AFTER gratuity. They tipped me about 20 on top of that because they were too busy fighting.

DOUBLE TIP.

-Tara

The Glass Hit Her in The Back of The Head!

I was a barback for 3 months at a VERY up scale hotel/restaurant/bar a year ago. These people were astoundingly rich, we charged people $8 a beer (minimum) and $19 for a shot of Patron and they would order them by the dozen. They thought they were invincible.

I was working one evening and it was particularly busy and the service was incredibly slow, like a “wait 10 minutes for the bartender to even glance at you” slow. Anyways, a guy comes up to me asking for another drink. I explained to him that I could not serve him because I was only a barback (it was easy to mistake people because we all wore the same uniform). It was very loud and what I thought he said back was “Can you just get me a drink of water?” So, I filled a glass up with water and gave it to the gentleman (probably around 45ish and I was 20). He immediately started screaming at me “FUCK YOU I SAID MY DRINK TASTES LIKE WATER GIVE ME ANOTHER DRINK!!” and threw the glass behind the bar  hitting one of the female bartenders in the back of the head. All of the bartenders went silent and out of nowhere one of them climbs over the bar and tackles the guy that threw the drink. Security dragged that asshole out of the bar never to be seen again.

-Daniel

Little Man Tries to Pick a Fight With a Marine

I watched from behind the bar as a WASTED little man was trying to pick a fight with a Marine on leave.

He turned to the little guy trying to piss him off and goes, “Look, I get it. I let you hit me, you look like a hero. I beat you up, I just look like an asshole.” Pause. “I’m not afraid to look like an asshole.”

The guy sunk back and didn’t bother him for the rest of the night.

-Mike

But We Could Still be Friends Right?

I went to pick up plates from a couples table. The woman was crying to the man saying: “But we could still be friends right?!!” I walked backwards.

-Jen

Would You Work For That Wage?

I can’t tell you how many times I want to wear a shirt to work that says “I work for 2.13 an hour, would YOU work for that wage?” and then hang signs on all my tip jars that say “This is *not* just a tip jar, this is my *paycheck* – have a great day!”

-Gigi

Ninja Karate Spin Chop

Probably one of he coolest “fights” I ever saw was a Marine and some guy who was trash-talking him.

I was behind the bar talking to the Marine who was having a beer, and this other guy was standing behind my buddy, talking shit about him.

He was doing his best to ignore the guy, but finally sighed, handed me his beer, spun around, hit the guy – with an open hand- just under the ear and the guy just folded like fucking origami. Then the Marine turned back around, took his beer back and resumed the conversation as if nothing had happened.

-John

Cold Hearted

I had a couple have a fight which ended with the guy running out crying an the woman just sitting there on her phone looking like she couldnt care less. it was brutal

-BreakRoomStories